Clark & Amanda Buffam

Selecting your Officiant is indeed a big deal. 

And it must be a big deal to your selected Officiant as well. 

As you make your choice of Officiant, I encourage you to select someone who resonates deeply with you – in terms of personality, approach, work style, budget and the “intangibles.”  I know I’m a best fit for many couples and not a best fit for others.  It’s important that you choose your Officiant and your Officiant chooses you.

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Personality Plus.  As you select your Officiant, you are looking for someone who feels “comfy” to you – someone whose personality and approach to creating ceremony appeals to you.   Officiants come in many sizes and packages.  Your quest is to do your homework to find someone who “gets you” as a couple, who is eager to know you better and at the end of the day, someone you feel will best celebrate your loving relationship with the ritual of wedding ceremony.

Guarantees – Nope!  In this work that I do, I am often asked, “what if something happens to you?”  Trust me, my worst nightmare is getting hit by a bus on the way to a ceremony or some other unexpected event that prevents me from showing up.  And in the nine years of doing this work, I’ve always shown up.  I work not to worry about things I can’t control.  My promise in this work is that I’ll move heaven and earth to get you married on time and with someone else if something does indeed happen to me. 

And the take away from all of this?

Selecting your Officiant is most likely an unfamiliar process to both of you - it’s not like you do this every day!  So, my best counsel is to interview several of us and ask your hard questions.  If you walk away from a meeting with a potential Officiant with a happy and peaceful feeling in your heart, you’ve most likely found your best match.

Congratulations to Clark and Amanda Buffam, married 1 year ago at Herban Feast’s SODO Park!   I fondly remember and honor this couple as they celebrate their 1st wedding anniversary.

The Olympic Sculpture Park in Seattle is a truly beautiful and contemporary venue for a wedding ceremony.

Nick Steier and Kim Callahan were married this Fall on a sweet and cloudy Seattle Sunday afternoon surrounded by very happy family and friends.

As I was pondering this post, I remembered that Kim is crazy about Christmas.  Knowing this and as I was preparing and writing their ceremony, I sent Nick an email asking if he’d like to present an early Christmas gift to Kim during their ceremony. 

Nick thought this was a terrific idea and during their ceremony, we appropriately set things up to present a surprise and early holiday gift to Kim.

I like surprises during a ceremony.  However, they must be appropriate and authentic.  There is a certain sweetness that comes with a surprise moment and working with your Officiant to incorporate a surprise that is meaningful and uplifting is a way to create a lifetime moment.  And for the beautiful Kim, Santa came early!

On a crisp Autumn day this Fall, Steve and Kristine were married at The Salish Lodge surrounded by their dearest family and friends.

What made this ceremony extra special was Steve and Kristine’s desire to include each person at their ceremony in their Thai water ritual.

Over the years, I have conducted a Thai water ritual and it can be written and/or facilitated in a number of ways.  For this ritual, Steve and Kristine were seated and with their hands over bowls, family and friends (starting with immediately family), poured water over their hands, starting from the wrist to the fingers – offering words of blessing and best wishes.

When orchestrated well, this ritual creates a lasting memory for family and friends of inclusiveness and leaves a couple with a great sense of community, friendship and support.  And my appreciation to Kristine’s Mother who was with us from her assignment in Thailand with the Peace Corps who gave me some extra special tips around this ritual and it’s tradition.

Photo:  Daniel Sheehan – www.abeautifuldayphotography.com